Tis the week before Christmas, and all through my house,
not a present’s done wrapping, I feel like a louse!
The time is speeding by, it soon will be gone,
with not much to show for it, at Christmas’ dawn.
When what to my wondering mind should occur?
With a to-do list to guide me, this week I’ll endure!
JENION’S PRE-CHRISTMAS TO-DO LIST
- Update flash player on work computer in order to stream Christmas music 24/7
- See Jen Tally to have my
mustache removedhair done - Call family members to wish them a Merry Christmas and assure them “pakages are in the mail”
- Vacuum dining room multiple times to clean up glitter from holiday crafting “experiment” gone wrong; realize you now have a deep red area rug that permanently sparkles
- Regale friends and co-workers with humorous – or do I mean scary? – stories of Christmases past (such as the time the house filled with toxic fumes and we began Christmas camped out at Perkins; we actually found the bottom of the “bottomless pot” of coffee)
Borrow XanaxMeditate on maintaining inner peace at the airport- Compare and contrast at least three film adaptations of the Dickens Christmas classic about Scrooge
- Regale friends and co-workers with touching – or do I mean scary? – stories of Hanson Family Christmas Rituals (such as my mother’s traditional “Wait, I have to go to the bathroom!” exclamation just as we are about to go downstairs to see if Santa Claus came)
- Schedule at least two more opportunities to listen to John Denver and The Muppets “A Christmas Together” – don’t forget to say out loud how angry you still are that they left Fozzie Bear’s rendition of “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” off the CD (it was on the original vinyl album circa 1979)
- Buy another box of 50 Christmas cards because you are certain the first box of 50 won’t be enough cards NOT to send out this year.
- Try not to shout at other drivers. Santa or his elves may be watching.
- Remember to say “Thank You!” and “Merry Christmas” to your sales clerks, postal carrier, the housekeeping staff at the office, and God.
LOL! Lovely post, Jen! Can’t wait to see you!
Merry Christmas Jen- This post is awesome and so true!
Muppets! One of the best Christmas Carol version was theirs, and I still have that vinyl album and a functioning record player … time for Christmas music …